Sunday, January 15, 2012
A New Hope On the Dairy
I was on duty this morning watching The Farmer scraping the lots and hauling it all away. He calls it Waste Removal and Nutrient Management. All of that manure will really improve the quality of his crop land, but watching him do it over and over is what I call monotonous. It did create a great opportunity for me to work on my screenplay, A New Hope On The Dairy.
"A long time ago on a farm far, far away.." is how it starts. My villain is the evil Darth Acre who wants to rule the galaxy by destroying all dairy farms and thus the supply of milk and calcium. Without it all the people's bones will get weak and he will easily crush them. A young dairyman, Luke Skymilker, works on a family farm with his aunt and uncle and their trusty robot milkers, Cheese-3PO and R2-Cheese-2. When their farm becomes threatened he decides to join Rebel Farmers, a dairy cooperative made up of all sizes and types of farms, led by Leia Organic.
They would not be successful without the intervention of the local veterinarian, old Doc Kenobi, who teaches Luke how the calcium in milk builds strong bones. "Use the milk, Luke, to defeat Darth Acre," he tells the young dairyman. Along the way a farm machinery dealer, Han Silo and his shaggy looking parts manager, Chew-baccer, join them in the fight.
May the milk be with you!
Agent 477, reporting from the Udder Side.