Monday, January 27, 2014

Dairy Cows Interviewed On Surviving Polar Vortex

We made it on tv! When the news team came to interview us about what happened during the polar vortex we couldn't believe it. Several cows made it onto the final broadcast as you can see below. I think there is an important message at the end, too.



Agent 101, reporting from the Udder Side.

Tuesday, January 21, 2014

Cows Eating Hay

Life is all about the hustle and bustle, even for cows. We come in from the field, we eat, we're milked, we eat again, and head back out to pasture. Here's a quick sample of when we ate hay.



The down time between milkings is what we enjoy most. Kicking our hooves up and relaxing out in the pasture. Don't you forget to pause and enjoy life. And remember to take time to smell the roses and drink your milk!

Agent 10, reporting from the Udder Side.

Thursday, January 9, 2014

How Buffett Is Helping To Beat The Polar Vortex

While there has been no change in latitude there has definitely been a change in attitude with all of us cows and The Farmer. I believe our plan of attacking the Polar Vortex with Jimmy Buffett music has turned the tide! We are at a beautiful 40 degrees so far today and are looking at over 50 for the next few days. The only question to ask is why didn't we do this sooner?!?

What we accomplished with blowing the cold back couldn't have been done without the hard work of music listeners like Janice Person and Melissa Burniston.

Photo courtesy of Janice Person
The Farmer has been busy carrying water, thawing pipes, and fixing the busted ones. We moo often. It seems to hurry him up, or at least it gives us something to do. We did not produce as much milk during the cold, but I have told all of the other cows that we need to get back to our previous output soon.

In the meantime I did a survey on the top five favorite Jimmy Buffett songs that have been played on the farm to blow back the cold weather to Canada.

5. The Cattle and the (Farm) Kid
4. A Farmer Looks at Forty
3. We Are The Cows The Farmer Warned You About
2. It's Milking Time Somewhere
1. Why Don't We Get Drunk and Moo

If you are still cold there is no time like the present to join the fight!

Agent 287, reporting from the Udder Side.

Monday, January 6, 2014

Beat The Cold With Buffett

Well the cold air has finally made it far enough south to reach us. The first thing you hear on the TV is to take care of the elderly and the animals and I couldn't agree more. The Farmer is working hard to make the best of it for us.

What this makes me think about first is border security. Why is the United States dealing with this cold arctic air? Because the terrible border control we have with Canada!


Obviously this is escaped weather from Canada and now we know who to blame! 

There are some that will tell you how to survive this cold weather like these 15 tips from Janice Person. But I say we should not try to simply survive the cold, I say we beat this cold and it back where it came from!

The Buffet Plan

The Buffet plan begins in part of the Southest South. I propose that at nine o'clock Eastern Time (because EST is God's time, and don't let anyone tell you otherwise) that everyone, and I mean everyone, point their speakers North and begin playing Jimmy Buffet music. 
Beginning in Florida and moving up into Georgia, Alabama, Mississippi, and Tennessee everyone can continue blasting the warm beach sounds and we can use the power of these sound waves to push the cold back up into the arctic where it belongs.

This is going to take teamwork and it will be a very coordinated effort in order to make it work. I suggest you make a pot of the hot chocolate with milk that The Farmer posted yesterday and crank up the music! 

Agent 287, reporting from the Udder Side.