A Poem For Grace The Calf

They say write what you know so here's my little ditty for National Poetry Day.

We're always glad to be fed, but some of us, like Grace, would love it if The Farmer would hurry up! 

Agent 2476, reporting from the Udder Side.

The Cruel Lives Of Calves Without A TV

Think of the minimal requirement for the modern world. If you said the television then you, sir or madam, are correct. So I ask you why does The Farmer not allow us to have one in the calf barn?

There are so many important things we are missing out on like the new Bachelor show, or the news and stuff. Yes, we could clickity-click dot com our shows and news on the internet, but there is something wonderfully couch potatoie like in watching television. That reminds me. We also need a couch.

This is what The Farmer thinks is appropriate for dairy calves to have; fresh bedding, hay, grain, water, and milk. He does a good job of feeding most of the time.

Like I said, most of the time. Have you ever had the problem of not being fed fast enough? Yeah, me too.

Remember, if The Farmer asks you why there were hoof marks on the couch in his living room and calf slobber on his television remote you don't know anything about it. Maybe he'll get the hint soon.

Agent 2452, reporting from the Udder Side.

Cow Appreciation Day On The Farm

Okay, so most new calves are up and nursing their momma pretty soon. Others, like me, need a little help. I was starving, well, maybe not starving, but I was very hungry for some milk and I told my momma I was going to need some help. That was when The Farmer stepped in. He worked with me and my momma and showed me where the milk came from. After a few minutes I got the hand of it, but he kept on helping. Finally I was like,

"Dude, I got this!" 

Antibiotics Saved My Life!

There I was literally listening to Death himself knocking at my door. Not just knocking, but pounding on my door while my lungs wheezed and strained for breath. Right before the door gave way The Farmer came in like Superman and---

Maybe that was too much Hollywood style drama. Let me start over.

There, that's more like it.

I had been feeling bad and doing my best not to show it, but The Farmer had been watching me closely. Yes, I am a little small, but I'm going to be big someday, at least I have the chance to be now anyways. Obviously, I got worse. I started coughing and wheezing like a squeaky toy. I didn't want to eat or drink anything. Not milk or water, and not hay or grain. Nothing.

That's when The Farmer gave me the shot of antibiotics. Or should I say the first shot! I watched him from my stall reading the label on the bottle of medicine and then counting on his fingers to make sure he was measuring out the right dosage. Then he gave me the shot. Lets be honest; it didn't feel good.

But the next day, wow, I was feeling better! I drank all my milk on my own and stuff. On the day after that I was even more better, I thought, but The Farmer had other plans. There he was with the needle again giving me another shot, saying something about following the directions on the label for the antibiotic, and you have to follow the label! So, I got a second shot!

Now, that was a week and a half ago and I can tell you honestly I am well! I feel good all over! No more coughing or wheezing! Thank you antibiotics! I am enjoying my milk, grain, and hay again. More milk would be nice, please!

Agent 2433, reporting from the Udder Side.

You're Surrounded, Farmer!

We've got you surrounded! Come out with your hands up!

Okay, while we did surround The Farmer we actually did not say that to him. My fellow agents and I only wanted to get a closer look at what he was doing. Sometimes the best spy work is done in plain sight and I honestly don't think The Farmer thought anything about it.

He was working up the ground for planting corn which I had never seen before. I wondered why he couldn't simply plant the corn in the field and save some time so I asked my boss, Agent 101. She said the particular field we were in had not had anything planted in it since last year's corn and that the ground would be very hard. If you plant in ground like that the roots will have a hard time stretching out and growing. So, while The Farmer does sometimes "no-till," that is plant crops without working ground, in this particular instance he would not.

We had been worried about the corn because it has been so hot and we had a couple of weeks with no rain. However, after some good rains this past week it is looking much better.  Maybe we'll have something good to eat this fall after all.

Agent 2432, reporting from the Udder Side.